What Is It About Me???

I was having my typical work night…busy busy busy…focused only on getting everything done that needed to be done…when something happened that made me stop in my tracks…
I had received report and was doing my assessments and passing my meds when I entered one of my patient’s rooms.  My first thought as I entered “This is a sweet old man...I could end up wanting to take him home with me” (of course once home I would just add him to the collection of my sweet old patients).  Believe me when I say that thought soon flew out of my head…
As I was giving him his medication, and assessing him, he told me that today was his wife’s and his 50th something wedding anniversary.  I told him congrats and that was a long time to be married.  He was sad his wife was not able to make it to the hospital to be with him…as I was encouraging him and trying to cheer him up (which could have been a mistake) the next words out of his mouth were… “You are so nice…can I have your phone number?”  I think my jaw dropped a little and I asked him why.  “Because you know we can hook up sometime” and he winked.  (He actually had the nerve to throw in the wink!!!)…
Um…um…What in the world do you say to that???!!!!!!!!!!  I quickly told him I didn’t think that was a good idea and “What in the world would your wife think about that!!!???”  His reply… “Well she doesn’t have to know”.  I just looked at him like…”What are you thinking!!!!”
So one awkward moment down for the night…and it was only 2100…Gee how could it get any better (believe me when I tell you this wasn’t the most awkward moment I experienced that night).
Later on that evening, I entered this same patient’s room because his IV pump was beeping and annoying everyone.  As I was replacing his IV fluids with a new bag and fixing the pump, I felt a tug on my pants.  At that moment, I felt a cool breeze on my legs…meaning only one thing…the little devil had actually pulled my pants down!!!!...As I grabbed my pants to pull them back up…what else would happen but then one of the other nurses I work with just so happened to enter the room!!!!  She looked at me pulling up my pants with a face as red as a fire engine…and at the patient who was smiling from here to all get out…and back again…and opened her mouth but all that came out was a fit of hysterical giggling.  She left the room still laughing just as hard.  I quickly finished what I had to do in the room, and went to face the other nurse. She of course was still laughing and having way too much fun.   Seriously…Really???!!! Why is it always me who gets in these situations with my patients????  I must have a sticker on my head that reads… “Always up for that awkward moment”…At least I’m making an impression on my fellow co-workers.  ;)